Child: "Mrs. S., I don't have a pencil to write with for math."
Teacher: "That is okay. I have lots of pencils right here (pointing to a cup of pencils on a counter) that you can borrow."
Child: "Thank you Mrs. S. for the pencil."
Teacher: "You are welcome and you never have to worry about asking me for something you need. We can always find a solution."
This particular conversation connected with me because I have observed quite a few teachers engaged in the same conversation with a student but the interactions and outcomes have been much more negative. Oftentimes when teachers are approached by students asking for something that they think their students should already have, teachers find it inconvenient and/or enabling a student by giving them the materials they need even if they should have them in the first place. But the reality of that situation is that we all need assistance at times. How many times have you asked a co-worker to borrow a pen while in their room to leave a note? There is a reason people keep pen and pencil cups on their desks or in their work area. Yes, it is for their use but also if someone needs one. In our school office, we have parents and family members come in to sign in but there is not a pencil or pen by the sign-in sheet. They ask one of the secretaries for a pen or pencil and return it when they are done.
I enjoy being around this teacher because of how calm and patient she is with children but also with adults. I also enjoy talking with her because our philosophies about early childhood are very similar and we both believe that how we talk and interact with children does make a difference and your words and actions can make or break a child.
Below is a YouTube video about how simply changing our words can change the message. It is one of my favorites and the message sticks with me and reminds me to be more aware of how and what I am saying and how those words and actions can affect those around me, especially children.
References
Derman-Sparks, L., &
Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young
children and ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.
Laureate Education, Inc.
(2011). Communicating with Young Children. (Course
Media). Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebapps%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_4197532_1%26url%3D
Rainer Dangei, J., & Durden, T. (2010). The nature of teacher talk during
small group activities.
YC:
Young Children, 65(1), 74-81. Retrieved from http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login? url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=ehh&AN=47964033&site=ehost-live&scope=site
